That's some double standards going on.. Similar events but both becomes my fault is really perplexing for me.. I do hope that it have got nothing to do with self righteousness or nativity of some people.. Then again, it might have been a figment of my imagination..
Saturday, June 8, 2013
Tuesday, March 19, 2013
Oh man...
Its been about 9 months since that fateful concert, and 9 months since I last had band practice.. And I still feel like finding a new band to go for band practice! It's like a drug addiction that I cannot stop, and it feels like withdrawal, even now! At night I will dreamt about concerts the next day and I haven't even practiced! Or I am practicing in my dreams.. Or sometimes teaching.. Whenever I am free from work, if it's a practice day, I will get restless because I no longer goes for practice.. It just feels so wrong at different levels that I am not attending practice.. I get nerves when I know that a concert is coming up, but I am only part of it because I am a QM, not because I am a Trombonist.. People get to be fully part of it, but I am there because there is a shit job needs to be done and someone has to do it and it had to be me.. Sucks to be me, no? But that's more to it.. I am not sure if I want to move on with or without Trombone in my life..
The thing is that since I stopped Trombone for a while I actually have Time.. More time to do some stuff, more time to hang out with others, like family and friends any time I want.. No more shit jobs, or rather less shit jobs for me.. At least I am not physically in band to do it.. I am outside doing work through my estimations and my foundations that I laid.. I can actually rest on days when my project is less demanding on my schedule.. It cannot be helped that I am in a project based course and holding a comm position that demands lots of my time and energy during both normal practice and during concert periods.. I am truly burnt out.. But since I stopped, I could rest more.. Even though I am still staying up for projects at least I have lesser on my mind and can don't be expected to run around like an idiot when I am actually so exhausted and packed with so much things to do.. I know everyone is busy with school, but they're just so darn selfish with their own part that they're not willing to help or be initiative and worst of all, they turn it on you.. And that's worst than no appreciation by the rest.. Well, since they do not know the whole thing, it will be easy for them to take things for granted..
On the other hand, this is unprecedented, this kind of event and this kind of situations.. It's the very first time I actually stopped going for band and leave a band halfway.. For the past 9 years, this is unprecedented.. I still love Trombone, music and band.. But I am afraid that the next band will have people I do not want to play with, since band scene in sg is small.. I am not sure if I can find a place whereby there's a balance between player and musicality.. Commitment without sacrifices, commitment without expectations and commitment without assumptions and being taken for granted.. Its impossible to have perfect of everything.. But I am still hoping for this to be a band in sg that I haven't discover to exist.. Maybe I should decide only when I have settled down on a fixed job first before taking another shot at the leap of faith instead of admist the chaotic schedule and the period of uncertainty on things such as applications to various places..
And may, by then I would have settled on a decision once and for all instead of being uncertain like now.. Hopefully it's the desired outcome that I have so longed for..
Saturday, February 23, 2013
It's been a Long, Hard Road...
Now that the final presentation has finally ended, in fact about a month ago, 28th January 2013, I have yet to really find time to settle down and think through certain things.
Ever since 3rd week of January until yesterday was mostly a blur of events, starting from my birthday week, till Final Design Review (FYP Final presentation), to free lancing for TDR, to Chinese New Year to Mother's operation, back to free lancing and University application and now, I finally got a chance to let go a sigh of relief. To think that in almost one month's time I am so packed, I still have other things to worry, of which my hands are just too full, I cannot carry anymore.
The opportunity given by Scott from The Design Icon, TDR, seems really exciting yet tiring at the same time, due to the nature of the work and timeline, at times I have to sit in front of my laptop for 12 hours, (of course with some breaks in between), it makes me think more about whether I want to continue the design path or not, on the another hand, because it is a project with short time frame, so it is so rushed, perhaps once I am more settled I will be able to leave my workplace at a certain timing and maybe OT once in a while rather than every other day.
I have actually applied for University application, to me, its a gauge to see if I can enter local U at all, although if I were to apply for certain course such as Arts with a lower GPA, definitely I will have a better chance, but still, it's an experience to try for something that I have always wanted to. Let's see the result in one month's time.
Although my original plan is to get into a job by late-March to early-April, it seems that I won't be able to really do so due to SPF project and another project, the yay side is that I can be better prepared should I go into Design related job field, get more contacts, get more industrial experience as compared to others with similar projects but no industrial experience. The nay side however is that it will be less efficient if I were to go into non-design related field, it might eat into my next year's plan, it also will delay my other plans such as studies and side lessons.
The downside of looking for jobs is that I cannot be entirely truthful of my situation, since I am waiting to change into a different course, Lifescience, yet I can in Design means that I cannot really let people around me to know that Design is my "backup" plan to land a job faster, but I do think Design certainly had some beauty in it's job, but sometimes it's really exhausting and I am certainly not that one with solid interest, it's true that I came into this course because of my choice, but rather it's my lack of it, to land me into this kind of situation, but what to do, I can only change or integrate the field after I get my degree in biomedical science. That's why I think it's still quite far from my reach. Next year, hopefully, I can start my foundation course in MDIS, and hopefully I can actually move onto the degree course, which I will only know after 9 months.
And as of today, I am really sure that I STILL missed band and Trombone, A LOT! I am always thinking of these two, and very envious of those who are still part of one band that they are comfortable in going back to. For now, I do not have one, I am really tempted to try and find one that I do not need my own instrument and one that I can be really worry freed to enjoy music making. I am really letting go of NYPSO, it's been a tough time doing that, but it is certainly more difficult for myself if I do not do it. Sometime, it's like that, this is what Life can be. Even if I put in 100%, at the end of the day, I might not even see 10% of it's result, hopefully the future batch will at least try to show that I can step down already, so far I have yet to see anything concrete.
I am also really glad to be able to leave the school for good, for their system is really too screwed up. I am really beyond word at times, it pains me to see my effort go down the drain at such a crucial time, from the fact that NTU has removed "Material Engineering" from the "List of Relevant Degrees" for "Diploma in Industrial Design" right after I achieved the GPA to get in, is a tight slap on my face, to the school has reduced my hard work to get my GPA up to null, it's a joke to them, but certainly not to me, it may sound personal but it ruins people's life just because of them being unable to be impartial. I have sweared that I worked as much as how a person who is not so passionate about design can work, I worked part-time during my school terms, and I have joined a CCA, albeit is my interest, still I had managed to do it, and all these now become nothing because of them, just one grade killed my entire hard work, sounds really like a joke.
How do I ever let anyone truly understands my pain? Finally I can at least sort these horrible feelings I had since a while back, just before my final presentation when I had almost lost all hopes. Adding in the fact that mother had an operation recently, at least she is getting better now, before that I was a wreck inside, everything all pent up inside. Honestly I almost could give way, which I held on, if not I will not be able to finish my things. Now things are picking up a little, so I could at least give myself a pat on the back to have at least accomplished things albeit that's some ups and downs, here and there.
At the end, it's all boils down to all in a day's work.
Ever since 3rd week of January until yesterday was mostly a blur of events, starting from my birthday week, till Final Design Review (FYP Final presentation), to free lancing for TDR, to Chinese New Year to Mother's operation, back to free lancing and University application and now, I finally got a chance to let go a sigh of relief. To think that in almost one month's time I am so packed, I still have other things to worry, of which my hands are just too full, I cannot carry anymore.
The opportunity given by Scott from The Design Icon, TDR, seems really exciting yet tiring at the same time, due to the nature of the work and timeline, at times I have to sit in front of my laptop for 12 hours, (of course with some breaks in between), it makes me think more about whether I want to continue the design path or not, on the another hand, because it is a project with short time frame, so it is so rushed, perhaps once I am more settled I will be able to leave my workplace at a certain timing and maybe OT once in a while rather than every other day.
I have actually applied for University application, to me, its a gauge to see if I can enter local U at all, although if I were to apply for certain course such as Arts with a lower GPA, definitely I will have a better chance, but still, it's an experience to try for something that I have always wanted to. Let's see the result in one month's time.
Although my original plan is to get into a job by late-March to early-April, it seems that I won't be able to really do so due to SPF project and another project, the yay side is that I can be better prepared should I go into Design related job field, get more contacts, get more industrial experience as compared to others with similar projects but no industrial experience. The nay side however is that it will be less efficient if I were to go into non-design related field, it might eat into my next year's plan, it also will delay my other plans such as studies and side lessons.
The downside of looking for jobs is that I cannot be entirely truthful of my situation, since I am waiting to change into a different course, Lifescience, yet I can in Design means that I cannot really let people around me to know that Design is my "backup" plan to land a job faster, but I do think Design certainly had some beauty in it's job, but sometimes it's really exhausting and I am certainly not that one with solid interest, it's true that I came into this course because of my choice, but rather it's my lack of it, to land me into this kind of situation, but what to do, I can only change or integrate the field after I get my degree in biomedical science. That's why I think it's still quite far from my reach. Next year, hopefully, I can start my foundation course in MDIS, and hopefully I can actually move onto the degree course, which I will only know after 9 months.
And as of today, I am really sure that I STILL missed band and Trombone, A LOT! I am always thinking of these two, and very envious of those who are still part of one band that they are comfortable in going back to. For now, I do not have one, I am really tempted to try and find one that I do not need my own instrument and one that I can be really worry freed to enjoy music making. I am really letting go of NYPSO, it's been a tough time doing that, but it is certainly more difficult for myself if I do not do it. Sometime, it's like that, this is what Life can be. Even if I put in 100%, at the end of the day, I might not even see 10% of it's result, hopefully the future batch will at least try to show that I can step down already, so far I have yet to see anything concrete.
I am also really glad to be able to leave the school for good, for their system is really too screwed up. I am really beyond word at times, it pains me to see my effort go down the drain at such a crucial time, from the fact that NTU has removed "Material Engineering" from the "List of Relevant Degrees" for "Diploma in Industrial Design" right after I achieved the GPA to get in, is a tight slap on my face, to the school has reduced my hard work to get my GPA up to null, it's a joke to them, but certainly not to me, it may sound personal but it ruins people's life just because of them being unable to be impartial. I have sweared that I worked as much as how a person who is not so passionate about design can work, I worked part-time during my school terms, and I have joined a CCA, albeit is my interest, still I had managed to do it, and all these now become nothing because of them, just one grade killed my entire hard work, sounds really like a joke.
How do I ever let anyone truly understands my pain? Finally I can at least sort these horrible feelings I had since a while back, just before my final presentation when I had almost lost all hopes. Adding in the fact that mother had an operation recently, at least she is getting better now, before that I was a wreck inside, everything all pent up inside. Honestly I almost could give way, which I held on, if not I will not be able to finish my things. Now things are picking up a little, so I could at least give myself a pat on the back to have at least accomplished things albeit that's some ups and downs, here and there.
At the end, it's all boils down to all in a day's work.
Monday, December 31, 2012
The road so far... 2012
Its the last day of the year of 2012, duh! Its the first time I use mobile blogging, its an impulse.. (On a bus, on the way to meet Ivy)
This year is certainly quite an ok year, as usual, some up and some down.. But still better as compares to 3 years back.. Time flew, doesn't it? Although I say that every year, but the passage of time is not exactly flowing the same.. Some feels longer, some feels right.. Finally, I am at the last leg of my poly education.. I am glad and relief that the end is near.. I can finally move on and do my own things, and finally I can say that this route has ended, the past will be behind me..
I am really surprised by the changes that happened this year, whether its it good or bad, it's hard to really say until I can prove it.. One thing that I really came to realize, especially after my recent meet up with Mr Ong is self compassion (which I only know the term even more recently), my experience with my current band, NYPSO had indeed almost ruined my passion, of which most of the people around me either didn't really know or understand what has happened, which I cannot blamed if they're not directly part of this horribly orchestrated series of event.. That was the trigger, the last straw.. When we talked through it, he made me realised that all along I had the answers, which I am aware, I just didn't want to face it.. And he also drew my attention to some things that although I knew but failed to acknowledge.. Bottom line is that this year made me realised that people are indeed selfish, be it peers, people around you, even your closest friend and family, last but not least, thyself, everyone.. At the end of the day what matter is yourself, as in, what do you want to achieve, not those, the world only revolves around me that kind.. What you're willing to do, might not be what others are willing to give..
So I really learnt a lesson, some people can be so darn selfish that they are willing to ruin others just so that they can proof themselves, their stand, without any concern for others nor the situation.. At times I had wished that I am not so considerate towards the whole picture and just blow out on the spot to proved my point too.. What happened last time was damaging to me, albeit none physical, but still, made tremendous impact on certain aspect of myself.. At the end of everything, which I am glad that it kind of goin to end, at least at the end of the day, I finally can put things down..
When I turned 21 this year, it made me really face some decisions that I previously I hadn't think through and that's why I was in a situation that left me high and dry.. But I will manage, and things will sure have its sunny and it's rainy days, it's a new journey ahead, especially starting from March!
I have many things to look forward to, from getting a new job, to building my very first rig and to prepare for my very first overseas trip to Japan and Taiwan in 2014, it seems really far, but I am glad that I will have a chance to be there by my own effort!
It will definitely be a year full of changes, big or small, it's still inevitable, I will just have to take one step at a time!前進め!
Thursday, September 27, 2012
Okay, so tomorrow I suppose to go out of Singapore...
Going Batam with Ivy, Siew Keng and Straven!
Honestly, I am a little more than excited I guess, since it's like eons (7 years) ago since I actually go on an actual trip, rather than a one day trip kinda thing.. So totally looking forward to getting massage and all.. My parents are kinda hyped up, cannot blame them either since they're naturally worried and Batam is not the safest place on Earth, still, for Gaia's sake I have to go out there eventually, moreover it's just a 3 days 2 night trip, plus it's not like we're wandering around.. But I do appreciate it..
Anyway, since I am done packing, I should really get some sleep soon, if not..
Hope I can take nice pictures on the trip! ^^
I start to think that buying yarn is like buying shoes (kinda), its never enough.. And the selections are tempting, when I see this, I feel like making hat, see that, it can be a bag, etc.. So yea..
I bought new yarn today! :D Although its a gift for others, but I am so glad.. Oh shit.. Haha..
Honestly, I am a little more than excited I guess, since it's like eons (7 years) ago since I actually go on an actual trip, rather than a one day trip kinda thing.. So totally looking forward to getting massage and all.. My parents are kinda hyped up, cannot blame them either since they're naturally worried and Batam is not the safest place on Earth, still, for Gaia's sake I have to go out there eventually, moreover it's just a 3 days 2 night trip, plus it's not like we're wandering around.. But I do appreciate it..
Anyway, since I am done packing, I should really get some sleep soon, if not..
Hope I can take nice pictures on the trip! ^^
I start to think that buying yarn is like buying shoes (kinda), its never enough.. And the selections are tempting, when I see this, I feel like making hat, see that, it can be a bag, etc.. So yea..
I bought new yarn today! :D Although its a gift for others, but I am so glad.. Oh shit.. Haha..
Friday, September 21, 2012
Time flies like nobody's business..
I think it's rather inevitable that my blog will rot time and again..
It's always fun to revisit some of my old posts to find out what exactly happened a year ago or etc.. But to think that I have actually forgotten that I actually changed to a new skin for this blog is kinda something new..
Anyway, looking at present, I am at my fifth semester already! In fact, end of fifth semester! This blog was started when I was Year 1 in MI, meaning that it is about 5 years old! Wow.. I am finally on my final semester! Things are not doing very well this semester, but not the worst yet, which is still good because I think a little down makes the next upturn sweeter.. And I think I should have mopped enough, I mean last time I had mopped a long, long time, so now it's more about how to rectify things and make things straight again rather than mopping which will achieve absolutely nothing!
IAP which had just ended taught me how to work, which makes me more ready to go out to work.. And also I finally feel slightly better since I am "earning" some allowance due to IAP, makes me feel slightly more financially "independent", so now I just want to focus on "enjoying" the last of my poly days.. Since I would never know if I still have chance to meet my current polu clique anymore.. Especially some of them are international students..
Many things have changed, especially last few years, to think that the old me was at that state kinda shocked me, after all it didn't really occur to me that it was happening.. All I feel was that I was in this weird trance.. But that's part of life too I guess, everyone have their own phase..
On the other hand, its time for me to tryout as much new things as I can for this holiday, although I doubt it will be much, but I want the grades to pay back! It's pay back time, man! I want to give as much as I can for this final semester! Clear it and move on with life!
Since the next year its a crucial year for me, along with my plan I want to achieve as much as I can within this one year and go Uni after my Japan and Taiwan trip with Ivy! ((:
Maybe I should start planning for NaNoWrimo 2012! And hopefully I can conquer this challenge, unless the school schedule is screwed up..
Oh well, later!
[Sentences of the day: Don't let the current problems drag you down, nor let the future blind what's beneath your feet, if not you'll fall either way. Plan as you go, try as you walk for you never know when you will stumble upon your lucky stars.]
It's always fun to revisit some of my old posts to find out what exactly happened a year ago or etc.. But to think that I have actually forgotten that I actually changed to a new skin for this blog is kinda something new..
Anyway, looking at present, I am at my fifth semester already! In fact, end of fifth semester! This blog was started when I was Year 1 in MI, meaning that it is about 5 years old! Wow.. I am finally on my final semester! Things are not doing very well this semester, but not the worst yet, which is still good because I think a little down makes the next upturn sweeter.. And I think I should have mopped enough, I mean last time I had mopped a long, long time, so now it's more about how to rectify things and make things straight again rather than mopping which will achieve absolutely nothing!
IAP which had just ended taught me how to work, which makes me more ready to go out to work.. And also I finally feel slightly better since I am "earning" some allowance due to IAP, makes me feel slightly more financially "independent", so now I just want to focus on "enjoying" the last of my poly days.. Since I would never know if I still have chance to meet my current polu clique anymore.. Especially some of them are international students..
Many things have changed, especially last few years, to think that the old me was at that state kinda shocked me, after all it didn't really occur to me that it was happening.. All I feel was that I was in this weird trance.. But that's part of life too I guess, everyone have their own phase..
On the other hand, its time for me to tryout as much new things as I can for this holiday, although I doubt it will be much, but I want the grades to pay back! It's pay back time, man! I want to give as much as I can for this final semester! Clear it and move on with life!
Since the next year its a crucial year for me, along with my plan I want to achieve as much as I can within this one year and go Uni after my Japan and Taiwan trip with Ivy! ((:
Maybe I should start planning for NaNoWrimo 2012! And hopefully I can conquer this challenge, unless the school schedule is screwed up..
Oh well, later!
[Sentences of the day: Don't let the current problems drag you down, nor let the future blind what's beneath your feet, if not you'll fall either way. Plan as you go, try as you walk for you never know when you will stumble upon your lucky stars.]
Tuesday, March 22, 2011
I really sucks at updating my blog..
My blog will just slide away from my memory and I will procrastinate! LOL
Anyway, I want to talk about friends, in general.. Friends that I in contact with, like the furthest I have in contact (or rather got interactions) with goes back to as far as 12 years ago, or those I only met briefly in an event or whatsoever.. Of course the latter don't give me much to say, but they sometimes give me insights or unexpected delight..
Those friends I still have contact and still wants to stay in contacts forms the basis of my daily life, aside from my family of course. I think all of us have changed since the first time we all met, especially those whose friendship with me are countable by years, may not be physically but definitely mentally..
Some changes are drastic than the others, but whether is it good or not, I will keep the comments to myself, after all, who am I to judge? No one likes to be judge either..
But I certainly do have a question in mind, posted to all my friends:
"Are you truly happy about the change?"
There are many things surrounding the changes, not everyone may support you, but are you satisfied with it? True happiness goes beyond skin deep, other people will judge your appearance because they don't know you.. But they know the superficial side of you and approve on the superficial part of you shows how shallow the relationship is if this is where their interest to know you lies.. And to keep this up because you think this is what makes you "happy" then I think you are lying to yourself, then again you might not be wrong too.. Because been right is overrated, being normal is overrated.. The concept of being right right is honestly, never right..
Right or wrong is dependent on the moral of the society one is subjected to, and the conditions surrounding it.. But most of all, you should be liable to yourself and people around you.. Being right can be overrated, doesn't give you the right to go wrong or deviated purposely..
Time and time again, I will try to do self reflections on what have I done for my goal.. How far off am I? Has my decision or rather my lack of it, cause any drastic changes or anything to people around me? Am I on the right track? Because if I don't do it, no one else is going to plan for me..
I always thought that those people who had their life changing moments during some point in life, will have an eureka moment! But I'm wrong, they got their moments just like us, what they did different is, they chose to put words into actions, real actions, not the half arse kind of action! So I will have to move my ass too..
That's all for now..
Anyway, I want to talk about friends, in general.. Friends that I in contact with, like the furthest I have in contact (or rather got interactions) with goes back to as far as 12 years ago, or those I only met briefly in an event or whatsoever.. Of course the latter don't give me much to say, but they sometimes give me insights or unexpected delight..
Those friends I still have contact and still wants to stay in contacts forms the basis of my daily life, aside from my family of course. I think all of us have changed since the first time we all met, especially those whose friendship with me are countable by years, may not be physically but definitely mentally..
Some changes are drastic than the others, but whether is it good or not, I will keep the comments to myself, after all, who am I to judge? No one likes to be judge either..
But I certainly do have a question in mind, posted to all my friends:
"Are you truly happy about the change?"
There are many things surrounding the changes, not everyone may support you, but are you satisfied with it? True happiness goes beyond skin deep, other people will judge your appearance because they don't know you.. But they know the superficial side of you and approve on the superficial part of you shows how shallow the relationship is if this is where their interest to know you lies.. And to keep this up because you think this is what makes you "happy" then I think you are lying to yourself, then again you might not be wrong too.. Because been right is overrated, being normal is overrated.. The concept of being right right is honestly, never right..
Right or wrong is dependent on the moral of the society one is subjected to, and the conditions surrounding it.. But most of all, you should be liable to yourself and people around you.. Being right can be overrated, doesn't give you the right to go wrong or deviated purposely..
Time and time again, I will try to do self reflections on what have I done for my goal.. How far off am I? Has my decision or rather my lack of it, cause any drastic changes or anything to people around me? Am I on the right track? Because if I don't do it, no one else is going to plan for me..
I always thought that those people who had their life changing moments during some point in life, will have an eureka moment! But I'm wrong, they got their moments just like us, what they did different is, they chose to put words into actions, real actions, not the half arse kind of action! So I will have to move my ass too..
That's all for now..
Monday, October 11, 2010
Suprise update! Cause Fiona is dragging the time.. :P
Guess what? I've a tumblr account.. For a while already, but not that long.. Is just that I'm pretty lazy to go over to tumblr since I already have blogger.. LOL..
Maybe next time I'll use Tumblr for projects and artsy stuff.. So yea, should post pic and snippets at Tumblr especially now that Sem two starting soon..
Yesterday was the famous 10/10/10.. And I've partake in the Worldwide Moment this year.. 10-10-10 GMT10:10AM (or was it EST?) Anyway, I've checked, is local time 18:10.. So yea, when to take a pic before going into the Hougang Point to get something for Fiona.. Waited until the time is over cuz I don't want to take the pic inside the mall..
This is the pic.. I've a few more.. I might upload later onto Fb or Tumblr..
Tml is the release of the Sem 2 timetable, I hope that the timetable will be a good one.. Something similar if not same as Sem 1 will be loved! I'll find out anyway.. Now I'm a little concern over which GSM I'll be offered.. And hope that got a few friends also in the same GSM, so that is not so boring..
I almost forgot I got O level to take.. =.= And I'm kinda lazy to practice math again.. ZZZ But still, it have to be done..
Look, I even put in a pic.. I guess I'm a little bored today..
Maybe next time I'll use Tumblr for projects and artsy stuff.. So yea, should post pic and snippets at Tumblr especially now that Sem two starting soon..
Yesterday was the famous 10/10/10.. And I've partake in the Worldwide Moment this year.. 10-10-10 GMT10:10AM (or was it EST?) Anyway, I've checked, is local time 18:10.. So yea, when to take a pic before going into the Hougang Point to get something for Fiona.. Waited until the time is over cuz I don't want to take the pic inside the mall..
This is the pic.. I've a few more.. I might upload later onto Fb or Tumblr..
Tml is the release of the Sem 2 timetable, I hope that the timetable will be a good one.. Something similar if not same as Sem 1 will be loved! I'll find out anyway.. Now I'm a little concern over which GSM I'll be offered.. And hope that got a few friends also in the same GSM, so that is not so boring..
I almost forgot I got O level to take.. =.= And I'm kinda lazy to practice math again.. ZZZ But still, it have to be done..
Look, I even put in a pic.. I guess I'm a little bored today..
Today we had our gossipy session at the good 'ol chong boon mac..
It had come to me that maybe I had overlooked something.. As much as I want to disagree, we had to sometime do other things aside from focusing on what we had in front of us now.. And I think I've not being catching up enough with all of my other friends who I have not talk to them face to face for a while..
Maybe I should have come to term with myself that I'm heading towards the 2X very soon! =.= ZZZ
We can only stay young for this long.. And truthfully speaking, find a partner has fallen off my mind without me knowing and I'm fine with it since my hands are alr too full with other stuff.. And all the mentions of this commitment makes me think a little harder on this again..
The hands that cover mine many months and days ago leaves behind a deep impression that is hard to erase.. If only the four letter words does not spell as regret..
Not just that, there are also many things I need to buck up upon and the list is pretty much endless..
My friends at MI will graduate first, followed by my friends in poly who had erolled in year 2008! I really wish all of you best of luck, time flies and now you guys will either continue your studies in uni or preparing to work in the real world.. We're no longer kids anymore.. The year 1991 babies are goin to hit 2X in yr 2011 and become offically adults in yr 2012 (sounds like the year the world ended fictionally)..
MI friends will end their life in pre U in less than 60 days and now is their final lap! Poly friends are mostly in the midst of their FYP and looking forward to their grad in April 2011..
For me the life in poly had just started.. I still have another five sems to go, while some is already going to start their last sem very soon..
In another week's time will then marks the start of sem 2..
Maybe I should have come to term with myself that I'm heading towards the 2X very soon! =.= ZZZ
We can only stay young for this long.. And truthfully speaking, find a partner has fallen off my mind without me knowing and I'm fine with it since my hands are alr too full with other stuff.. And all the mentions of this commitment makes me think a little harder on this again..
The hands that cover mine many months and days ago leaves behind a deep impression that is hard to erase.. If only the four letter words does not spell as regret..
Not just that, there are also many things I need to buck up upon and the list is pretty much endless..
My friends at MI will graduate first, followed by my friends in poly who had erolled in year 2008! I really wish all of you best of luck, time flies and now you guys will either continue your studies in uni or preparing to work in the real world.. We're no longer kids anymore.. The year 1991 babies are goin to hit 2X in yr 2011 and become offically adults in yr 2012 (sounds like the year the world ended fictionally)..
MI friends will end their life in pre U in less than 60 days and now is their final lap! Poly friends are mostly in the midst of their FYP and looking forward to their grad in April 2011..
For me the life in poly had just started.. I still have another five sems to go, while some is already going to start their last sem very soon..
In another week's time will then marks the start of sem 2..
Thursday, September 30, 2010
Time to update again..
I was kind of shocked that my last entry was dated before the start of sem 1.. Is such a waste, lots of things happened inbetween.. But then again, I won't be going back to talk about them.. Is like too much to cover..
All in all, sem 1 is very:
-Fast
-Busy and hectic
-New
-Must be well paced!
Towards end of Sem 1..
In fact the month of Jul, there's Metier VIII, SIBF and my submission for Studio Project! Everything almost went south! But after tat super busy mth.. Everything jus went quiet so suddenly.. A little too free.. Due to O-level I decided not to work except for a short term one.. Daiso stock taking again.. Tonight is the last day! (Yay!) Tml going to cut hair, like finally!
Throughout sem 1, I pick up a few skills, not very good yet, but still learning.. Like drawing (a real deal, not for fun), workshop skills, pottery skills and guitar!
Just got my result for sem 1.. Not sure if I'm totally glad about it.. Hope to do better next sem! Which will be worse.. ZZZ
Is been like 6 yrs (around), since I had such a holiday! Like totally nothing much to do! I think is because, I'm not in school band liao! And alumni band went for haitus.. SIAN TO THE MAX!
Maybe for the next two weeks before sem 2 starts, I would camp in school for pottery and O level math revision..
All in all, sem 1 is very:
-Fast
-Busy and hectic
-New
-Must be well paced!
Towards end of Sem 1..
In fact the month of Jul, there's Metier VIII, SIBF and my submission for Studio Project! Everything almost went south! But after tat super busy mth.. Everything jus went quiet so suddenly.. A little too free.. Due to O-level I decided not to work except for a short term one.. Daiso stock taking again.. Tonight is the last day! (Yay!) Tml going to cut hair, like finally!
Throughout sem 1, I pick up a few skills, not very good yet, but still learning.. Like drawing (a real deal, not for fun), workshop skills, pottery skills and guitar!
Just got my result for sem 1.. Not sure if I'm totally glad about it.. Hope to do better next sem! Which will be worse.. ZZZ
Is been like 6 yrs (around), since I had such a holiday! Like totally nothing much to do! I think is because, I'm not in school band liao! And alumni band went for haitus.. SIAN TO THE MAX!
Maybe for the next two weeks before sem 2 starts, I would camp in school for pottery and O level math revision..
Monday, April 12, 2010
Hmmm..
A bit lazy to update, lol..
Firstly, I shall blog about end of last month! Lol..
The last two weeks of March is my working week, for that matter I was working at two different places.. At Prudential as PA and Counter for Daiso's stocktaking..
And on 23rd, things are a bit crazy, because I'm working for the whole day! From 11am-7.30pm is at Prudential and 9.30pm-6.00am is at Daiso! But fun nonetheless! First time working night shift plus working with Fiona, Yin Ming, Ivy, Siew Keng and Miao Ling.. Although Siew Keng and Miao Ling is working different shift as us, but we all knew how it was like to work at Daiso! Haha, one word after work is SHAG!
Although first day we were rather dismay at their environment but after that we began to enjoy the job a little, fun despite the staffs are strict.. And made a few friends since people with similar shifts, works on the same day, so you'll see familiar faces on the day2 and 3..
We only worked for three days, 2 night shifts and 1 day shift.. It's certainly a good experience.. Maybe in future that's a chance I might consider working there again.. Of course, like this time, I'll also ask the same group of friends if they also want to work again.. :)
Then comes April!
Alumni Band will be on hiatus for two weeks, damn sian lor..
On 1st April, went to Rey's house there to celebrate Glenn's birthday with Daniel, Roger and Bryan at the condo's BBQ pit, many thing happened in between, was fun nonetheless.. For the less obvious reasons! Like to "camp" at the air-con lobby the most..
Then after cake cutting, went to Bryan's house to play game for round II, (played Worms initally in the afternoon.. ), played Silent Hill: Homecoming on PS3.. That's when I got hooked! LOL
After that walked home around 3 plus am with Rey..
Then the next day, due to large amount of left over food, we had a second round..
After that went Bryan's house again to play PS3.. Played Silent Hill again, and fight the first boss! Took about one hour! LOL! And finally walked home (again) at around 4am.. Lol!
And now the orientation is near, but I've yet to get my ez-link card yet, lol.. And the Roadshow is finally approaching! Just one more week away! I think I will go with Acer 4820T!
Firstly, I shall blog about end of last month! Lol..
The last two weeks of March is my working week, for that matter I was working at two different places.. At Prudential as PA and Counter for Daiso's stocktaking..
And on 23rd, things are a bit crazy, because I'm working for the whole day! From 11am-7.30pm is at Prudential and 9.30pm-6.00am is at Daiso! But fun nonetheless! First time working night shift plus working with Fiona, Yin Ming, Ivy, Siew Keng and Miao Ling.. Although Siew Keng and Miao Ling is working different shift as us, but we all knew how it was like to work at Daiso! Haha, one word after work is SHAG!
Although first day we were rather dismay at their environment but after that we began to enjoy the job a little, fun despite the staffs are strict.. And made a few friends since people with similar shifts, works on the same day, so you'll see familiar faces on the day2 and 3..
We only worked for three days, 2 night shifts and 1 day shift.. It's certainly a good experience.. Maybe in future that's a chance I might consider working there again.. Of course, like this time, I'll also ask the same group of friends if they also want to work again.. :)
Then comes April!
Alumni Band will be on hiatus for two weeks, damn sian lor..
On 1st April, went to Rey's house there to celebrate Glenn's birthday with Daniel, Roger and Bryan at the condo's BBQ pit, many thing happened in between, was fun nonetheless.. For the less obvious reasons! Like to "camp" at the air-con lobby the most..
Then after cake cutting, went to Bryan's house to play game for round II, (played Worms initally in the afternoon.. ), played Silent Hill: Homecoming on PS3.. That's when I got hooked! LOL
After that walked home around 3 plus am with Rey..
Then the next day, due to large amount of left over food, we had a second round..
After that went Bryan's house again to play PS3.. Played Silent Hill again, and fight the first boss! Took about one hour! LOL! And finally walked home (again) at around 4am.. Lol!
And now the orientation is near, but I've yet to get my ez-link card yet, lol.. And the Roadshow is finally approaching! Just one more week away! I think I will go with Acer 4820T!
Saturday, April 10, 2010
Wednesday, March 17, 2010
I can only hope..
That my transfer is successful! Seriously!!!
And now I think of things ahead, I think it's time for me to act..
And I think that the most important thing of all is that people are given a RIGHT chance!
Because without it, even if you're capable, there's no way you can get it! No even a chance to try!
We're not afraid of failure but rather without a chance to even try out..
Just hope that my chance will come! :)
And now I think of things ahead, I think it's time for me to act..
And I think that the most important thing of all is that people are given a RIGHT chance!
Because without it, even if you're capable, there's no way you can get it! No even a chance to try!
We're not afraid of failure but rather without a chance to even try out..
Just hope that my chance will come! :)
Sunday, March 14, 2010
You know..
I think that maybe I think a little too much.. Are you for real, or it's just my imagination? It just suddenly struck me that things are deflecting towards you.. I should had been more careful, but I guess it's too late to say anything now.. Maybe it was all an act.. You're the smart one? Hmm..
Tuesday, March 9, 2010
Amigurumi Doraemon! :)
Last month, Feb, was Cindy's Birthday, so I made her an amigurumi Doraemon with a pattern I found online.. Since she likes blue, circular things and she likes doraemon! Lol!
Just some facts.. Amigurumi is a sub of crochet which literally means crochet in rounds (continuously) since normal crochet is usually in rows, and amigurumi is usually for making stuff toys, etc..
Since there's lots of online patterns around so I tried searching for one and lucky me I found it.. But it's in Spanish, so with Goggle Translate and some online sites I manage to fingure out how to go about doing it.. (well, more or less.. Lol)
So I went to Golden Dragon which is located at People's Park Centre to look for yarn and I decided to use Sirdar Snuggly DK (8 ply) 50g, since the color is the one I wanted and later I found out it was a type of baby yarn (usually use to knit/crochet baby products) and later at Elise I brought the white color one together with a new hook (btw, it's not a ear hook!) size 5/0-6/0..
First, I started with the head:
The face..
Then, now it has more shape after I put in the stuffings..
The Back, shows how I close..
The Green paper clip acts as the stich marker so that I know where the round ends.. lol
Now I have close it..
And well, accident happens, the body was a bit too small.. :P
btw, this is how it looks like inside, with all the changing of colors..
hands..
A pair of them.. lol..
Attaching Head to Body.. Like an operation.. lol..
Then adding on hands..
Till now, it has a pair of arms and body..
This is after I did the collar and the bell, which I totally regret putting it so early, cuz it does it's job really well! A little too well in fact..
The I position the eyes and nose.. Looks kinda funny.. lol
Well, not forgetting about his pouch tat Cheris was so adamant about! Lol.. And since Cheris has a point, despite it not being in the pattern, I improvised it in.. lol..
Now, legs.. :)
Finally, all the limbs are attached.. Now it's time to do up the face..
Since I do not have the eyes yet, I get a pair of matching color pins to sub it.. So that I can roughly know where to put the nose and others..
Time for the mouth.. The pic is a bit blur.. lol..
The the whiskers, what's a cat w/o whiskers? Lol.. Personally, I like this pic a lot.. Looks kinda cool.. Lol.. :P
Since YiTing says it looks so like an ang moh killer Doraemon, I decided too let it hold the needle tat is used to stitch him up.. looks kinda sadist.. LOL..
And FINALLY, really FINALLY.. It's DONE!! :D
*looks out of the bus*
Btw, the eyes are beads tat's so small!! I had a hard time threading on a wild Bus 169! Lol!
Although it's not perfect, nut it's my first amigurumi and first finished crochet project! Yay! So I'm satisfied! Haha.. And I added a key chain on top..
Happy (belated) Birthday, Cindy! :D
And now, this is my stash and hooks..
And I have brought another yarn and new hook! Size 7/0-8/0
Serious, first time posting so many pictures is such a pain.. The spacing are all over the place.. =.=
But still, it's done!! :D
Just some facts.. Amigurumi is a sub of crochet which literally means crochet in rounds (continuously) since normal crochet is usually in rows, and amigurumi is usually for making stuff toys, etc..
Since there's lots of online patterns around so I tried searching for one and lucky me I found it.. But it's in Spanish, so with Goggle Translate and some online sites I manage to fingure out how to go about doing it.. (well, more or less.. Lol)
So I went to Golden Dragon which is located at People's Park Centre to look for yarn and I decided to use Sirdar Snuggly DK (8 ply) 50g, since the color is the one I wanted and later I found out it was a type of baby yarn (usually use to knit/crochet baby products) and later at Elise I brought the white color one together with a new hook (btw, it's not a ear hook!) size 5/0-6/0..
First, I started with the head:
The face..
Then, now it has more shape after I put in the stuffings..
The Back, shows how I close..
The Green paper clip acts as the stich marker so that I know where the round ends.. lol
Now I have close it..
And well, accident happens, the body was a bit too small.. :P
btw, this is how it looks like inside, with all the changing of colors..
hands..
A pair of them.. lol..
Attaching Head to Body.. Like an operation.. lol..
Then adding on hands..
Till now, it has a pair of arms and body..
This is after I did the collar and the bell, which I totally regret putting it so early, cuz it does it's job really well! A little too well in fact..
The I position the eyes and nose.. Looks kinda funny.. lol
Well, not forgetting about his pouch tat Cheris was so adamant about! Lol.. And since Cheris has a point, despite it not being in the pattern, I improvised it in.. lol..
Now, legs.. :)
Finally, all the limbs are attached.. Now it's time to do up the face..
Since I do not have the eyes yet, I get a pair of matching color pins to sub it.. So that I can roughly know where to put the nose and others..
Time for the mouth.. The pic is a bit blur.. lol..
The the whiskers, what's a cat w/o whiskers? Lol.. Personally, I like this pic a lot.. Looks kinda cool.. Lol.. :P
Since YiTing says it looks so like an ang moh killer Doraemon, I decided too let it hold the needle tat is used to stitch him up.. looks kinda sadist.. LOL..
And FINALLY, really FINALLY.. It's DONE!! :D
*looks out of the bus*
Btw, the eyes are beads tat's so small!! I had a hard time threading on a wild Bus 169! Lol!
Although it's not perfect, nut it's my first amigurumi and first finished crochet project! Yay! So I'm satisfied! Haha.. And I added a key chain on top..
Happy (belated) Birthday, Cindy! :D
And now, this is my stash and hooks..
And I have brought another yarn and new hook! Size 7/0-8/0
Serious, first time posting so many pictures is such a pain.. The spacing are all over the place.. =.=
But still, it's done!! :D
Monday, March 8, 2010
Either I have did something to Life or..
Life just simply hates me.. =.=
It's like after traveling in 2π rad. I'm still stuck.. Damn you, Life!!
It's just so frustrating! Maybe I should jus accept things as what they are, like seriously! Damn!!!
It's like after traveling in 2π rad. I'm still stuck.. Damn you, Life!!
It's just so frustrating! Maybe I should jus accept things as what they are, like seriously! Damn!!!
Sunday, February 21, 2010
The Road so Far.. (late)
The Year of 2009 is pretty much a year that screams right in my face - A Year suck to be Me!
Things had pretty much like went south for the year! Like a domino effect, it just keeps on having reprecussions.. Like what Jolene describes, a year of coma.. So in general things are really bad.. My Dad underwent a knife, I totally screw up my education, my family's financial status I would say it's at it's low point and others etc.. And so the emotion and tensions were running high and dry..
But not all were bad.. The biggest gain I had was Friendship.. I made new friends and got more closer friends.. They are my pillars at my lowest and my joy when I was at my highest.. So they are very valuable asset!
I often wondered that how long should I continue with Band.. Seriously, I still do not know.. But as of now I am still continuing with Band and maybe for another year or two minimum and who knows what in future.. But my teacher told me that I should seek out my passion and reasons again as to why I joined Band.. Hmmm..
Things had pretty much like went south for the year! Like a domino effect, it just keeps on having reprecussions.. Like what Jolene describes, a year of coma.. So in general things are really bad.. My Dad underwent a knife, I totally screw up my education, my family's financial status I would say it's at it's low point and others etc.. And so the emotion and tensions were running high and dry..
But not all were bad.. The biggest gain I had was Friendship.. I made new friends and got more closer friends.. They are my pillars at my lowest and my joy when I was at my highest.. So they are very valuable asset!
I often wondered that how long should I continue with Band.. Seriously, I still do not know.. But as of now I am still continuing with Band and maybe for another year or two minimum and who knows what in future.. But my teacher told me that I should seek out my passion and reasons again as to why I joined Band.. Hmmm..
Saturday, February 20, 2010
A short update! :D *Surpise!*
There are things and photos I wanted to blog about before this.. Especially about last month.. But well, I'm lazy.. Lol.. So I just skip and blog abt today! :P
Today was awesome! Went Band then eat lunch with Fiona, Yin Ming, Cheris, Yi Ting and Amanda then get new spects then went to meet Jackie, Daniel and Roger to support Jolene and Yu Wen then went dinner with gang (minus Yu Wen) after which went to watch Chingay then fireworks and finally dessert before heading home! :D
But also very fattening! =.= Breakfast: 2 Roti prata Lunch: KFC 2 piece Chicken Tea Break: Teh C with ice Dinner: Popeye Dessert: Cafe Cartel's NY Cheese cake and Hazel Cakes (shared with the rest) plus Ice Chocolate Moo Moo.. I need to go on diet startin tml! >.<
[Phrase of the day: Friends are always around you when you need them! :)]
Today was awesome! Went Band then eat lunch with Fiona, Yin Ming, Cheris, Yi Ting and Amanda then get new spects then went to meet Jackie, Daniel and Roger to support Jolene and Yu Wen then went dinner with gang (minus Yu Wen) after which went to watch Chingay then fireworks and finally dessert before heading home! :D
But also very fattening! =.= Breakfast: 2 Roti prata Lunch: KFC 2 piece Chicken Tea Break: Teh C with ice Dinner: Popeye Dessert: Cafe Cartel's NY Cheese cake and Hazel Cakes (shared with the rest) plus Ice Chocolate Moo Moo.. I need to go on diet startin tml! >.<
[Phrase of the day: Friends are always around you when you need them! :)]
Tuesday, December 29, 2009
As usual.. This kind of time of the year.. It's The End of Year..
Well, since I don't know who to talk to I shall have a verbal diarrhea here.. Lol..
It seems that every year when it comes to end of year things seems to be 'darker' or more 'bleak' than usual.. Especially so for this end of year.. My mood swings like a pendulum, one moment to next it will swings from one end of the spectrum to another end.. But I don't think everything is my fault though.. If you ask me to leave I'll jolly well fuck off to chill somewhere else.. Pardon me for the colorful expression so as to speak..
It's like everything is spinning slowly, but surely, out of control.. Like holding on to the seams that are coming apart from all corners.. Usually, I may dread the coming year a little, last year was worst but this year is totally off! I can't even stand the thought of it.. The thing is people may not understand my thoughts, not that I expect them to totally go my way, but while pointing fingers I do hope they do spend a damn it second to think about it before shooting out their fingers! Nonetheless, this also applies to me..
Though I would say there are still things I can look forward to.. Alumni Band for now..
Sometimes I may not even be sure what am I thinking..
And I am SO going to miss my classmates and friends.. And well, they amazed me with their kind words.. That really touched me..
[Phrase of the day: Friends are those who do not ditch you while you are down, they are those who help you up..]
It seems that every year when it comes to end of year things seems to be 'darker' or more 'bleak' than usual.. Especially so for this end of year.. My mood swings like a pendulum, one moment to next it will swings from one end of the spectrum to another end.. But I don't think everything is my fault though.. If you ask me to leave I'll jolly well fuck off to chill somewhere else.. Pardon me for the colorful expression so as to speak..
It's like everything is spinning slowly, but surely, out of control.. Like holding on to the seams that are coming apart from all corners.. Usually, I may dread the coming year a little, last year was worst but this year is totally off! I can't even stand the thought of it.. The thing is people may not understand my thoughts, not that I expect them to totally go my way, but while pointing fingers I do hope they do spend a damn it second to think about it before shooting out their fingers! Nonetheless, this also applies to me..
Though I would say there are still things I can look forward to.. Alumni Band for now..
Sometimes I may not even be sure what am I thinking..
And I am SO going to miss my classmates and friends.. And well, they amazed me with their kind words.. That really touched me..
[Phrase of the day: Friends are those who do not ditch you while you are down, they are those who help you up..]
Tuesday, November 24, 2009
It's been a while..
*Cleans spider webs*
Well.. Two months since I last updated.. What can I say, time flies.. Lol
Well, in short life pretty much sucks and things can go in an unforeseen direction in unprecedented rate! :\ It's life I guess. But I think it's pretty much enough for one year. Too much, in fact.
Well, sadly, I didn't get to promote to Year Three, well, no one to be blamed expect for myself, I just got to work for it next year. But this is only the start..
At least my father's health is improving.
On the other hand, there seems to be an increase in expenses I need to clear each month.. Well, it sucks.
For now, there's concert coming up in a few weeks time, got revision to do. That's all that matter for now. I just do not want to think beyond that. Things are so unpredictable, especially people.
It still amaze me that how people can change so drastically and beyond recognition. Like a virus, they mutates. No doubt change is the only constant, but it's scary that it can occur so fast and silently, like a deadly virus.
People contradicts. They can be so superficial and hypocritical. But then again, not all are bad.
When practicing Noah's Ark, my very good friends, (High, high B flat and A) comes looking for me not to mention my good friend (equally high, G) joins in too. Oh well.. And I saw dao geis with three tails (The infamous semi-demi quaver). Yummy.. Did I mention 12/8? And other mixed meters.. So the first Alumni's Band prac is so,so gonna be fun!
When they mention, I can't help but think. Gosh, what am I gonna do?
Went to watch "Paranormal Activity" with Fiona, Yin Ming and Siew Keng last Thursday.
I would say, it's grossly overstated by some. So it turns out to be a disappointment for me, it's boring and so, so predictable. But the bottom line is, watch for the plot not the way the movie is filmed.
My next movie is gonna be Evangelion 2.0: You Can (Not) Advance. It's second in the tetralogy of the rebuild of Evangelion. :D
That's all for now..
[Phrase of the day: It's not that we cannot let go of the past, it's the past that doesn't let us go.]
Well.. Two months since I last updated.. What can I say, time flies.. Lol
Well, in short life pretty much sucks and things can go in an unforeseen direction in unprecedented rate! :\ It's life I guess. But I think it's pretty much enough for one year. Too much, in fact.
Well, sadly, I didn't get to promote to Year Three, well, no one to be blamed expect for myself, I just got to work for it next year. But this is only the start..
At least my father's health is improving.
On the other hand, there seems to be an increase in expenses I need to clear each month.. Well, it sucks.
For now, there's concert coming up in a few weeks time, got revision to do. That's all that matter for now. I just do not want to think beyond that. Things are so unpredictable, especially people.
It still amaze me that how people can change so drastically and beyond recognition. Like a virus, they mutates. No doubt change is the only constant, but it's scary that it can occur so fast and silently, like a deadly virus.
People contradicts. They can be so superficial and hypocritical. But then again, not all are bad.
When practicing Noah's Ark, my very good friends, (High, high B flat and A) comes looking for me not to mention my good friend (equally high, G) joins in too. Oh well.. And I saw dao geis with three tails (The infamous semi-demi quaver). Yummy.. Did I mention 12/8? And other mixed meters.. So the first Alumni's Band prac is so,so gonna be fun!
When they mention, I can't help but think. Gosh, what am I gonna do?
Went to watch "Paranormal Activity" with Fiona, Yin Ming and Siew Keng last Thursday.
I would say, it's grossly overstated by some. So it turns out to be a disappointment for me, it's boring and so, so predictable. But the bottom line is, watch for the plot not the way the movie is filmed.
My next movie is gonna be Evangelion 2.0: You Can (Not) Advance. It's second in the tetralogy of the rebuild of Evangelion. :D
That's all for now..
[Phrase of the day: It's not that we cannot let go of the past, it's the past that doesn't let us go.]
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